Tuesday, December 14, 2010

Beer Versus Anarchy

The Writing Technology/Beer Drinking/Alien Visitation thread continues….
This post answers a question posed by the author of The Blog of MAB in the Comments section of The History of Beer. See the post below titled The History of Beer
Beer brewing and drinking has always been a positive force in the history of mankind. In fact, beer drinkers provided the prerequisite foundation for the continuous advancement of a series of innovations in writing technologies and brewing processes, along with thousands of years of records of alien visitations. A side effect of the alien visitation records was the speculations that were the impetus for the invention of myriad organized religions, and the organized religions themselves would not have existed without the former innovation of beer drinkers, writing technologies. As such, brewers and beer drinkers can only be viewed as the primary stabilizing and innovating force of civilization.
In contrast, throughout recorded history wine drinkers have done very little of merit. They have caused many of the evils that have plagued mankind through 10,000 years of recorded history. If you think about it, it becomes obvious that the people like Bernard Madoff, who caused the recent worldwide recession (a polite word for depression) were and are wine drinkers. Here in Southern California we have another name for wine drinkers: Orange County Yuppie Twits. Other areas of the world have other terms for them, which recognizes their inherent evil.
The photo below is an illustration of the difference between beer and wine drinkers. 
   

Note that on the wine side of the photograph, only a couple bottles of wine are shown. That is because wine drinkers generally do very little of value, so nothing besides the wine is shown. Sure, they consume wine, which could be construed as a benefit to the human race, but it could also be easily argued that this produces an unnecessary wasteful demand for grapes, taking up a large amount of usable farmland which could be put to more positive use if planted with wheat and hops. In the English language there is a derogatory word for wine drinkers: “wino”. There is no derogatory English word for beer drinkers. 
Wine drinkers are often anarchists, ready to tear down the whole fabric of civilization to get rid of a few minor irritants. They are always ruled by an overwhelming compulsion to throw out the baby with the bathwater. For a historical illustration of this destructive compulsion, we need look no farther than the French Revolution, during which the wine drinking French citizenry overthrew their royalist government and beheaded an entire class of people to simply get rid of powdered wigs, snuffboxes, and effeminate clothing styles.
On the beer side, you will notice that the bottles and cans of beer are closely associated with Stage 3A writing implements for writing things down, and a camera for use in recording alien visitations. Beer drinkers and brewers are always prepared to advance the collective cause of human civilization in a positive manner.    

No comments:

Post a Comment